And as long as I’m going nuts posting links in someone else’s comments, I will post this one, to another feminist blog I happen love, even though I don’t always agree with what is posted there — http://www.feministmormonhousewives.org/

Oh, and don’t worry, I would never call you a “feminist,” Mrs. Parunak, because I’m sure that would make you feel the same way it makes me feel when people call me a “lady!”

I just enjoy reading blogs written by people who are living their convictions, as I am living mine — even if our convictions don’t happen to match.

I am — quite literally — the opposite. I am a feminist, and I gently correct people when they call me a “lady,” depending on their use, because it can be a term loaded with cultural nuances — in which case, it does not accurately describe me. I don’t see myself as a “lady,” though of course others are free to think of me as they wish.

I didn’t comment on this post last year, but I will now, and say that “feminism” existed long before the Industrial Revolution. The isolated, rural farm is only one model of traditional family life. Since ancient times, there have always been humans living communally, whether in big cities or small farming villages. There have always been communities in which children spent their days playing with their peers, under the watch of not just their parents but their extended family and neighbors. Some of these societies accepted women into positions of tribal/urban leadership, while others did not. There have always been women who aspired to these leadership roles, or to other roles performing traditionally male tasks. Sometimes they succeeded, sometimes they didn’t — my point is only that women like me have been around for a long time (and we’re not going away!).

I am a working mom by choice, not necessity. My own mother was a working mom by choice, and her mother was a working mom by necessity and then by choice (my grandmother had to leave school when she was 14 to go to work as a waitress to help support her family, and she continued waitressing for most of her life). My grandmother’s mom came from Poland, from farmers. Not much is known about her, since she died in childbirth when my grandmother was 8, but she managed to instill in her daughter a solid work ethic: If you want to stay at home, and can, that’s fine, but working outside the home to support your family is just as honorable for a woman as for a man. My grandmother passed this on to me, and now I am passing it on to my daughter and sons.

One more thought — just as all the different religious communities seem to have trouble deciding on a definition of what constitues a “true Christian,” we feminists differ greatly on who can call themselves a feminist. For example, while I am mostly a working-outside-the-home mother, I was a stay-at-home-mother for several years, for a variety of reasons. During this time, I faced accusations that I was not a feminist: http://thehomesickhome.blogspot.com/2005/12/failure-to-cause-i-never-joined.html